BALANCING A BUSY SCHEDULE WITH A NEW BABY

One of the questions I get asked all the time is how I balance my baby's schedule with two other kids and our busy schedule.

This summer has been a busy one for us. We've had trips to Las Vegas, San Diego, Palm Springs, New York, Beverly Hills, and this weekend we head to Phoenix. Philip has been traveling for work a lot, we've had space camp and swim lessons, we've had company several times...all with a brand new baby.

Yep, it's a lot.

BUT, we love to travel, we love company, I love my job, and our older kids need to be involved in some things outside the home, so we've been learning how to make it work without causing stress to ourselves or to San's little body as it learns and grows.

This month is Breast Feeding Awareness Month, so I'm teaming up with Munchkin to share six things we've done that are working for us.

1. Have a support system, don't be afraid to ask for help, and learn to say no. Ok, so this is more like three things in one, but for me these are far and away the most important thing to help me stay sane and balanced amidst a packed schedule. None of the five points below will work as well without these three things.

For me, my main support system is my husband. He's the one that encourages me to go on the work trip to New York City. He's the one who takes care of the boys (including San) while I leave town for the night. You need someone who pushes you to work hard, but also encourages you to take care of yourself.

Lots of people ask "how I do it all." And the easy answer is that I don't. The only way that things get done around here is to let other people help. When you're running on little sleep and the demanding needs of newborns, it's physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausting. The only way I stay on top of life and work is to ask for help -- especially in the first few months after San was born. And people don't always volunteer to help in the way you specifically need, so ASK or pay someone to help you.

My in-laws are both retired, so they're able to come help with the boys a few times a year, and I have a wonderful babysitter who comes over a few times a week so I can get things done during the day. As soon as San was born, I started paying someone to come clean my house once a month because I just can't get to it all on my own. I used to iron all of Philip's shirts, but now I take them all to the dry cleaner cause it's just one less thing. It takes a village, and it's okay to ask for help!

And most importantly, learn to say NO. You just can't do everything, so weed out the things that aren't important.


2. Be flexible, but stick to the schedule as much as possible. Right now San takes two naps a day -- a long one in the late morning from about 10:30 until 1:30, and a second shorter one from about 4:00 until 6:00. Whether we're traveling, in the car running errands, or at home, I try to stick to these nap times as much as possible. Sometimes things need to get done, even during nap time.

If we're running errands, I put a thin, breathable cover (that has a hole in the top) on his carseat so it's mostly enclosed and if he opens his eyes he doesn't get distracted, but instead just falls back asleep.

If it's close to his nap time and I know we're going to have to leave, I always put him to sleep in his carseat and then cover him up so he's ready to go once it's time to leave. And if we get home during the middle of his nap, I take his carseat up to his room and let him continue to sleep in there instead of trying to transfer him. I turn the fan and sound machine on, and he usually sleeps for his full nap time.

And the reality is, some naps just get cut short. It's life, and don't let it ruin your day. Just try again tomorrow.

3. Nap at home as often as you can. No matter how careful we are when we're out during his nap, there is always something that could wake him up -- the slam of a door, one of his brothers talking too loudly in the car, etc. He always, always naps better at home in his own bed. So I try to have him nap at home as often as he can, and try to rearrange my schedule so I can run any errands during his wake time or when my babysitter is here.

Also when he naps at home, we use a sound machine turned up pretty loudly, or the fan turned up to the highest speed so it's loud and keeps the room cool. My boys get constant reminders about "quiet feet" during nap time so they walk quietly past his room or down the stairs and don't wake him up.


4. Do your nighttime routine always, no matter where you are. Babies thrive on schedules, so this is a really important one. When our days are filled and busy, I always make sure our nighttime routine is the same, with a little one-on-one playtime, a quick bath, into pajamas, breastfeed him, and then swaddle him and put him to bed.

Now at five months he totally recognizes the routine and patiently waits to be fed before bedtime. It's a good way to get out the wiggles, cool him down, and then calm him before bed, and because of it he sleeps really well.

Also, if I'm out of town, my husband or babysitter does this exact routine (just with our Munchkin Latch bottle) so San feels calm and safe even if I'm not there.

5. Be patient and stay calm. Breastfeeding is something that can be so calming and relaxing for you and the baby, but can also be completely stressful and super painful. I personally love doing it and am grateful my body produces good milk for my babies. But my husband always says that babies are like animals -- they can sense your fear or stress, and they follow suit. I don't know the biology behind that, but I totally think a calm baby is a result of a calm mama, and if your baby is calm, feeding and scheduling go so much smoother.

If you're struggling with this, don't worry too much -- I was so high strung and stressed after my oldest was born, and now six years and two kids later, it's so much easier to not get raging mad in the night when you're being woken up for the fifth time. Or bursting into tears when your breastmilk tips over and spills everywhere.

Also, I do a fair amount of breastfeeding in public because we're out and about a lot. For some people it's more convenient to pump before they leave the house and then feed the baby a bottle -- I'm all for that. But since San is a fast eater, nursing in public isn't a huge deal for me. I bring a cover with me and either nurse him in the car before we go into a store, or I take the kids to the park and let them play while I sit on the bench and feed him. If you're stressed out or impatient, the baby will feel that and these out-of-the-house nursing sessions will be chaotic and stressful. Find a calm place, sit down, and relax while you feed your baby. I try to never make it feel like an inconvenience - instead, I think of it as a few minutes to sit and rest during my busy day.

6. Find products that improve your system. On days where I have to leave my baby with a babysitter, or overnight with my husband, the bottle is the biggest lifesaver. It's the thing that lets me get away when I need to.

I blogged here about how Fos never took a bottle (even though we tried so many different kinds), so I was thrilled to discover the Munchkin Latch bottle. It's innovated design and material gives it a shape and material that mimics the breast, so babies are easily able to switch back and forth between breastfeeding and bottle feeding. Seriously, this is a game changer. If you haven't tried this bottle, you must try it. San really does switch back and forth without a problem, and this allows me some flexibility so we can maintain our schedule while keeping a happy baby.


If you have any other specific questions about our schedules, leave them in the comments below! Or I'd love if you'd share anything you do to keep your baby's on schedule while still living your life.

photos by rad and happy

created in partnership with Munchkin

FOUR TIPS FOR KEEPING YOUR HOUSE CLEAN WITH KIDS

The reality of life with kids is that things get messy. But as a work-from-home mom, I've come to realize that I just can't function or work or be creative in a messy space. I mean, I make messes as I sew and create, but in order to have peace and calm and creativity in my home it needs to be clean. And even when I'm not working, I'm a much more patient and calm mom in a clean space. 

I've spent the last six years since B was born, working on ways to keep my house clean with kids, and how to strike a balance between crazy clean up mom and out of control clutter. So today I've teamed up with Munchkin to share four ways I've worked to maintain that balance and keep a tidy home, despite having little kids. 

1. Get the kids involved. From pretty much the moment they could start making messes, we've tried to teach our children responsibility for those messes. If they make the mess, they clean it up. Of course we're there to help, but they are responsible for the majority of it. I also almost always try to make it a game -- a race to see who can pick up legos the fastest, an assembly line as we pass toys from one person to the next, or see who can toss the most cars into the basket and make it (followed by cheers or "boo's" depending on if they make it or not). Also, I'm not above a little incentive. There are some chores that are just required of them as part of keeping the family home, like making their bed and putting their clothes in the hamper, but there are a couple of chores like unloading the dishwasher or taking out the trash that earn them a nickel or two.

2. Straighten up every night. Before bed, the boys have to clean up their room and all the legos need to be put away. But after that, Philip and I go around and straighten things as well. Philip does all the dishes, wipes down the counters and sink and starts the dishwasher every night, I sweep or Philip vacuums the kitchen and dining room, and then we straighten up the family room so everything is ready for the next day. Waking up to a clean and straightened house every morning is such a great way to start your day. 

3. Give everything a designated spot. There will be a few odds and ends that don't have a home, but for the most part everything in your house should have a spot. This makes it easy for your kids to learn how to clean up. Cars in one bin, art supplies in another, legos in another (or in 10 bins in our lego-obsessed boys' case), etc. And do the same for your things -- mail in one spot, school papers in another, work projects in another, etc. I used to be a "pile" person, where I'd just stack everything up and pretend it looked clean, but having a spot for everything and then training yourself to just put it away when you're done with it makes such a difference in the cleanliness of your home, and makes cleanup so quick and easy. 

4. Eliminate Odor. There is basically no point to a clean home for me if my house smells bad. And three boys can get pretty stinky! We just recently potty trained Fos, but before that a diaper pail was absolutely essential to keep our house not smelling like a giant diaper all the time. But now with a new baby in our home, we're back to a million diapers a day, and we still have pull-ups for Fos at night that we put in there. Munchkin's STEP Diaper Pail is best in class with odor control, with a lavender scented baking soda "puck" that absorbs the odor and keeps our nursery smelling fresh and clean, no matter how many billion diapers we stuff in there -- seriously, I forgot how many diapers newborns go through! And even better yet, this diaper pail isn't a giant eyesore in my beautiful, modern nursery. Its sleek white stainless steel design is modern and pretty, which makes me love it even more . We try to get our boys involved with taking care of the baby on some level, and throwing away his diapers is often top of the list since they love to step on the pedal to open up the pail. So even with a million dirty diapers, it's easy to keep our house smelling, looking, and feeling clean, all with the help of our kids...and this awesome diaper pail.

Consistency on these four things is key, and the more we do them and involve our kids, the easier it becomes. And I'm such a happier and more productive person with a clean house. 

Do you have any more ideas for keep your home clean with kids?  Share in the comments! 

thank you to Munchkin for partnering on this post  |  photos by rad and happy

LATCH

TOP  ||  JEANS  ||  NECKLACE

Nursing is one of my very favorite parts of motherhood so far. B was a horrible nurser and most of our nursing experience was me pumping and then feeding him a bottle, so I was sure that all my nursing experiences would be negative.  But then I had Fos. And gosh, that baby was an absolute dream to nurse. Every single feeding was enjoyable, and we had a bond like none other. But the problem with Fos was that he never, ever took a bottle. We tried probably ten different brands of bottles, but he refused every single one.

So before San was born, I was determined to do everything I could to get him to go back and forth from breast to bottle. We waited the recommended three weeks to introduce the bottle, and I was super nervous the first time, praying that he would take it, and without any fight he took it perfectly.

When we were going though a million different bottles with Fos, I was convinced that the design of the bottle was keeping him from taking it. The shape, the super long nipple, the firm plastic...none of it imitated a real breast, so of course he wasn't interested. So when I discovered Munchkin LATCH bottles this time around, and their soft, flexible plastic and round shape was a better design than anything I'd seen before, I was immediately impressed. And I'm convinced this smart design is the very reason San takes the bottle without any complaint. What I would have given for these bottles when Fos was a baby!

Now that San is 8 weeks old, we're feeding him with a bottle once almost every day, and not only does it allow the rest of the family to bond with San during feeding time (I could die of happiness when I see B feed him...I love that brotherly love!), but it also allows me some freedom. I can leave the house for more than two hours at a time and stress about a screaming baby and panicking husband back at home, and as a working mom this is a humongous blessing.

I keep saying "third time's a charm" about nearly everything with San so far, but really when it comes to feeding, Munchkin LATCH is the charm.

created in partnership with Munchkin  ||  photos by rad and happy 

8 POSTPARTUM ESSENTIALS

Belly Bandit. I didn't use this with my other boys, but I heard about it part way into this pregnancy and was curious about it. It's a thick, stretchy elastic band that Velcro's around your waist and hips to help move everything back into place after you deliver. I know for some people it helped with waist size, but for me it mostly helped with my hip pain. I had awful pain in my hips in the last few weeks of pregnancy, and then even worse after I delivered, so I wore this band as much as possible for the first few weeks to help support my hips and get them back in place, and it worked wonders.

Lily Padz nursing pads. I really, really hate nursing pads. I've tried both the disposable ones and the reusable ones, but disliked both of them -- the disposable ones smelled as soon as they filled with any amount of milk, and the reusable ones soaked through so easily and got soggy. But I produce a huge amount of milk, and it takes several months for my milk to regulate, so I'm forced to wear them.

So when I heard about these plastic ones, I was super intruiged. I bought two packs (it's kind of hard to tell but there are two padz in each package), and I absolutely love them. The first few times I used them, they smelled like plastic and made my breast smell like plastic, but I was just diligent about washing them with soap and water every single time after nursing, and within a day or two the smell was gone. Now I just wash them in the shower every night and that's great. Also, it's sometimes hard to get a perfect mold to your breast, so the little pocket of air can fill up when your milk lets down, so I just carefully take it off and dump the milk out, which hasn't been a big deal. Only a couple of times when I've been extremely engorged has it leaked out and soaked my shirt, so for the most part it does work really well.


Honest company organic healing balm. My friend gave this to me for my baby shower and everyone there swore by it. I used nipple cream for my other babies, but this one is really, really effective -- not only for cracked or bleeding nipples, but also for clogged ducts and other painful internal issues. Just a little swipe and it's instant relief! My only complaint about it is that you have to shake it before you use it because when it warms up, the ingredients can separate and then it will spit out a little puddle of oil when you go to use it.

Sleep Bra. This is such an essential, especially in those first few weeks when your chest is sore and sensitive. A good sleep bra keeps the girls locked and loaded while you sleep, which keeps them so much more comfortable. Also, the band around your ribcage is a little snug, so size up if you're nervous.

Breast Pump. I'm pretty sure pumping is a woman's least favorite thing (there is nothing that makes me feel more like a cow/milk machine than a breast pump), but when you're engorged in those first few days and weeks, a breast pump is an invaluable tool, and a great way to preserve all that milk so it doesn't go to waste. I know there are manual ones, but I really love my double electric one because it takes care of the job within a few minutes (I've tried manual ones and my hand almost fell off after pumping for ten minutes and I still didn't get more than an ounce or two (where normally I get four on each side).

Lightweight Pajamas. With all of my boys, I've gotten the night sweats after I deliver. I get them so badly some nights that I have to completely change all of my clothing because they're just so soaked (sorry, TMI??) So lightweight pajamas are an essential. This lightweight night shirt looks so comfy and easy to nurse in, but also some nights I'll sleep in just a lightweight t-shirt and that works great too.

A good nursing bra. It's taken me six years and three children to find an amazing nursing bra, but finally this time around I've found a few. I love this one because it feels and looks like a real (comfortable) bra, and that makes me feel more normal. Plus it's simple, but pretty!

Button up shirts. Although button up shirts are classic and always in style, they are suddenly really trendy which means there are so many good options available right now. They are the perfect nursing shirt, so I've dug up all the ones in my closet and snagged a few new ones. This one is my current favorite because it's insanely soft and a perfect neutral color, but I also love this one and this one!


Any other postpartum items you couldn't live without??

THE THING I WISH I HAD WHEN I FIRST BECAME A MOM

Over the last few weeks, as I've slowed down with San's arrival, I've thought a lot about my three experiences of having a newborn in the house. I was chatting with my best friend a couple of weeks ago and she mentioned that when she was a brand new mom, sunset each evening felt like the zombie apocalypse, where she was suddenly flooded with overwhelming dread just thinking about the upcoming night.

As soon as she said this, I remembered this exact feeling so distinctly. During the day after B was born, it was easy to think clearly and feel happy and excited about my new baby, but as the sun went down every night, all I could think about was how terrified I was that my baby would die in the night, or that I'd get absolutely no sleep, and suddenly my thoughts would be completely consumed by fear and dread.

This lasted for several months, and when Fos I had the same experience, and with San it's surfaced again. Fortunately each time it's lasted a shorter amount of time -- with B it was months before I didn't hate 7:00pm. With San it only lasted a day or two.

But even though I'm much less dramatic about it now, nighttime can still be stressful, and that's why I'm super grateful for my Owlet. It's a little sock monitor that you put on your baby's foot that checks their oxygen levels and heart rate and is designed to alert you if their levels drop out of range. What I would have given for one of these with my first two babies!

The monitor connects to an app on your phone and has a base station you can put on your night stand that is designed to sound an alarm if the levels drop, and I love being able to check on San from the app while he's sleeping without going into his room and risking waking him up. Plus I've been super motivated to brush up on my infant CPR skills since even though I hope to never hear that alarm, at least I'll know what to do if it ever does go off.

Especially if you're a first time mom, this is an invaluable tool in giving you peace of mind and hopefully keeping the zombie apocalypse feelings at bay. But even as a mom of three, it's helped me sleep better and and feel secure about my baby's well being.

Owlet is offering $20 OFF their monitors to all my readers through this link right here. This would also make an amazing gift for new mama's!

thank you to owlet for partnering on this post! |  photos by rad and happy 

WHAT I PACKED IN MY HOSPITAL BAG

A few weeks ago, as I was nearing my due date, I got a lot of questions about what I was packing in my hospital bag. Although I didn't pack my bag until about a week and a half before San was born, I spent about three weeks before that compiling a list of things I needed, and then tweaking it as time went on. 

I can hardly remember what I packed in my bag with my boys, but my list this time helped me bring exactly what I needed, and I had hardly any extras. 

Here's what I brought: 

• Slippers/Socks: I'm sure the hospital floors are cleaned every day, but I still liked having a pair of slippers to walk around in so I wasn't barefoot. But if you don't have slippers, bring a pair of socks or flip flops. I brought two pairs of socks anyway so I could wear them in bed when it was freezing cold in my hospital room (which I knew it would be).
• Robe: After wearing an ugly hospital gown for hours and hours, I really wanted to be able to put on something fresh and pretty. This gorgeous robe from Pretty Plum Sugar was perfect because it's incredibly soft, allows for easy nursing access, and made me feel so feminine and pretty. Plus, it's a great coverup for when guests come visit in the hospital.
• Heavyweight Cardigan Sweater. Another thing to keep me warm. I brought a big chunky one and slept in it both nights when I was freezing.
• Compression leggings. I know a lot of people like pajamas, and I do in the right setting. But after delivery when you are wearing giant pads and mesh underwear, a pair of loose pants might be comfortable, but personally I prefer a pair of pants that's super tight and keeps things from feeling saggy. I brought both of my compression yoga leggings and they were perfect.
• Sleeping Bra. The moment you start nursing, you're going to want to start using a sleeping bra. This one is incredibly soft and comfortable (size up one size if you're nervous since the band around your ribcage runs a little small).
• Nursing Bra. This isn't an essential actually because you could just use your sleeping bra the whole hospital stay if you don't want to switch to a regular one. I brought mine, mostly for my coming home outfit.
• Two or three comfortable tops. I wore my leggings both days in the hospital, and on top I just wore soft tees that were easy to pull up for nursing. I brought this one and this one and they were perfect.
• Coming Home Outfit. Save room in your suitcase and wear a pair of pants to the hospital that you can wear home. I brought this pair, which was perfect because the elastic panels gave me extra room while my uterus was still swollen (but I didn't need a pair with a full belly band).
• Nipple Cream. An absolute essential. Do not forget this. And do start using it before you even deliver! Someone gave me this one for my baby shower and I've loved it. It also doubled as chapstick, which was definitely an essential during my stay.
• Toiletries. This is all individual to each person of course, but I made sure I brought my makeup, toothbrush, dry shampoo, deodorant, a hair tie, and makeup remover wipes. Also my hospital didn't provide any shower gel or shampoo -- I wish I'd known in advance so I could have brought my own (and didn't have to jump out of the shower to pump hand soap out of the sink dispenser!)

For the baby. The hospital provides nearly everything you need --- diapers, wipes, blankets, clothes, etc. So really you don't need very much, but it's fun to bring a few things to make that brand new baby feel like your own.

• Swaddling Blanket. We've already tried a ton of different brands with San, and although there are pros and cons to each one, I really love the Solly Baby Swaddle. This one has a lot of stretch in it so it makes keeping him bundled really easy and he loves it!
• Coming Home Outfit. We kept him in his little white hospital tee for the entire time until it was time to go home. Then it's so fun to change him into his first real outfit. I bought this set from Old Navy, and it kept him cozy and warm.
• Hat: The hospital provides a little hat, but I liked having a little hat to take him home in. These ones from June and January are my favorite and they come in a million colors.
• Moccasins/socks. Something to keep those new feet warm! I loved having a pair of the Freshly Picked crib moccs for him. I've yet to find a good set of baby socks that stay on well, so I'm all ears if you know of any!
• Baby Nail Clippers. Those babies are born with razor claws. Our hospital didn't provide clippers or a nail, so it was helpful to have a pair on hand when he popped out with super long nails and I was concerned he would scratch his face.

Miscellaneous:

• Camera and charger. Don't forget this! We had my friend, Tara, come photograph us in the hospital (which I can't recommend enough -- it took the pressure off me and my husband to get some good photos!), but I was still glad to have my own nice camera to get some other shots of the baby when she wasn't around. Don't forget an extra battery or your camera charger!
• Phone charger. An essential -- your battery will be drained in a second with all the texts and calls you'll get with a new baby. So don't forget it!
• Snacks. My hospital provided three meals during the day for me, and although they were nice meals, there were hours in between when I had no food and I was starved. I was glad to have brought a bag of granola bars, cookies, fruit leather, nuts, and a few other snacks so I could eat them throughout the day when my newly nursing body was desperate for food.

I'll be sharing some postpartum essentials on the blog in the next few weeks too, so make sure you check back and don't miss it!

PARTY OF FIVE

My dress is old from Old Navy -- similar here. Philip's shirt is old from J.Crew, and the boys shirts are both from Old Navy. San's moccs are c/o Freshly Picked


We took these photos almost three weeks ago, the day after we came from the hospital. On one hand these three weeks have flown by, but on the other hand it seems impossible that we've only known San for three weeks because it feels like he's been part of our family forever. It's hard to think that we had this entire life before he came along.

Love these first moments as a family of five that my wonderful friend, Tara, captured for us.

photos by rad and happy